Light Up The Sky
by Roses-Fade
Summary: He put me back together and I ended up giving him my heart. He has the ability to break me beyond repair he just doesn't know it. I'm in love with my best friend. ALL HUMAN.
1. Night Adventures

**Disclaimer: I do not own anything except for the plot line. Everything else belongs to the wonderful and talented Stephanie Meyer.**

**So this is a short story that I have recently come up with. It's only going to be about 3 chapters long. It's a Bella and Jasper story and all the characters are human. I really hope you guys like it because I do. It's my favorite thing I've written so far. This one chapter took me hours to write. It would be better if I had a beta but, I don't. If anyone would be willing to beta for me though it would sure make me happy. Anyways enjoy.**

_You've got my head spinning  
Heart beating out of my chest  
I'm a sucker for lovers, for lovers_

_--I Don't Know About You But I Came To Dance, Forever The Sickest Kids_

* * *

The night was just beginning with the promise of rain lingering in the scent of the crisp air. I was in no hurry to get to my friend Jaspers house. Even though he was a year younger- and two grades below- me, we had become very close, very quickly. Looking at him, you wouldn't be able to tell that he was sixteen, he looked so much older. He was tall and lean but, he wasn't skin and bones. No he had quite a fair amount of muscle on him. And his abs were just yum. He had blonde hair that was shaggy and I loved running my fingers through it. He had different colored eyes. One was a pale green and the other a bright grey. He was incredibly good looking and I was so glad that we were friends. He was popular and nice and everything that I wasn't. Some days I wondered what stroke of good luck had led me to him. A face flashed in my mind though, reminding me of who it was that introduced us. Rosalie. The thought brought with it a wave of sadness. My once best friend. Now we barely talked.

I didn't know what happened with her. Not really. It was like we slowly grew apart. She took all my old friends with her too. But, I had other friends. Rosalie was pretty and thin and blonde. When she got her perfect boyfriend Emmett I was left behind. It hurt a bit but, I was used to it by now. Jasper told me that she missed me. The two of them were neighbors and the three of us used to be thick as thieves. I didn't really believe him though. I'm sure she said it to him but, I don't think she really meant it. I tried to talk to her but, now I had given up. I mean if she really missed me then she would ask me to hang out or something but, she didn't. I didn't tell Jasper any of that though. I just told him that maybe we'd be friends again one day. I was doubtful though. I hoped that I didn't see Rosalie on my way to Jaspers. I didn't even feel like saying hi to her. She made me tired. She was idiotic and selfish and I didn't have the time for her. I was a little wary of Jasper though. Hopefully he wouldn't talk about his girlfriend Alice the whole evening. I mean she was nice enough and everything but, I was sick of her. And I was sick of Jasper always bringing her up.

I was walking down the hill to his house when suddenly all the street lights went out leaving the night very dark. It was slightly creepy and I was a little scared. To keep myself busy though I entertained random thoughts putting them together until I thought I had something semi-useful. I liked the way I had put together the words. I was thinking them through my head. _'It's funny how these things happen. How in one day a simple realization can change your whole world. How suddenly someone means more to you than they were originally mean to. One chance meeting and then BAM! Everything's changed. It's like for your whole life if you've been thinking the sky is green but, realize instantly that it's been blue all along. Sometimes you never figure out your true feelings until it's ultimately too late. Other times it's instantaneous like a bush fire. Ignite. People want to go back and change the past so badly sometimes. Of course, that's impossible. You can't change the past but, you can change your future. It's weird how feelings change over time when originally they were meant to be so totally different. People are usually scared. They're scared that letting their feeling be known that they will ruin everything. It's a valid fear though because your imagination and the reality of the situation are two very different things. Sometimes though everything works out for the best and you can see the sun shining through the clouds. Love and hope. It's what makes people risk it all. Sometimes it's worth the gamble and other times you're left trying to escape the hole you made. Things change, people change and time heals most wounds.'_

I was feeling very proud of myself for coming up with that. It was a perfect description of my emotions and thoughts put into words. I realized with a jolt that I was at the bottom of the hill. The lights were on down here so I started thinking about Jasper again naturally. I sighed before texting him that I would be there soon. I was wary and excited at the same time as I rounded into Jaspers crescent. Maybe tonight I would finally have the courage to tell him how I felt. Most likely I wouldn't though. I was a coward. I was thinking about a few days ago when he and I had gone to Capital X together. It had been fun and I was relieving the memory of the heat of Jaspers body against mine. Sometimes it was like he knew how I felt and he was teasing me always sitting so close. Thinking of the contact between him and me always sent shivers shooting up my spine. It was just so unfair sometimes that I always had to fall for the wrong person. Well Jasper wasn't exactly wrong for me but, he had a girlfriend that he adored. Not even I would try to come between them so I was always the good sport when he made me come along with him. Almost everything Jasper had given Alice had been picked out or approved by me. I helped him make her a build-a-bear that we put in a spider-man outfit. I helped him pick out the white gold heart shaped locket he had given her as an early birthday present. I was sick of it but, I was a masochist so I would never turn him down if he asked me to go shopping with him for her. I loved spending time with him too much. I had stopped now outside his house. It was pretty big and a nice blue color. I loved his house and not just because he lived here. It was nice. I enjoyed his family as well. My thoughts were running all over the place as I waited for Jasper to appear. The gate to the back yard opened and suddenly Jasper was there. He greeted me with a hug.

"It's good to see you again Bella Swan." His musical bass voice rasped.

I loved Jaspers voice. It was deep and rough. Scratchy. He had a bit of a Texan accent as well. It always gave me Goosebumps when I thought about him whispering to me seductively. I was a little late to answer him though but, he didn't notice or he just didn't comment on it.

"We just saw each other the other day, Jasper." I said a little breathlessly.

"But, it's been entirely too long. I missed you." He whispered mockingly.

"Wow you sure are clingy then Mr. Whitlock. It's been what two, three days?" I teased.

He laughed and swung an arm casually around my shoulders.

"Are you ready to go?" he asked me. The hint of a laugh still in his voice.

"Of course."

We strolled off into the night towards the direction of a park. It was one me and Jasper went to often. It was close to his house maybe a 10 minute walk. I shrugged Jaspers arms off me and ran through the field. I loved running in the dark. I looked up at the stars and spun myself around in a circle. I got so dizzy that I ended up collapsing in the grass. I looked around from my position on the ground to see Jasper in the distance doubled over in laughter. I just shook my head and lay contently on the ground. I noticed as Jasper began walking towards me that it had begun to rain. It was just a light, soft drizzle but, I appreciated it. It felt nice when combined with the heat of the summer air. I was still lying in the grass staring at the pretty stars when Jasper joined me.

"You know Miss Swan; you shouldn't spin yourself around like that. You're already clumsy enough as it is you, could fall and hurt yourself." He began sternly.

"Mmm." I mumbled back. I wasn't really paying much attention to Jasper at the moment. I was too captivated by the stars. I always kind of longed to be one. I wasn't sure why but, the stars were part if the reason I loved the night so much.

I started paying attention though when Jasper dropped to the ground beside me stretching himself out. He was close and soon his mouth was by my ear. I shivered lightly when his hot breath blew across my face. He was so close that his lips moved against my skin lightly. It took everything I had not to roll over and pounce on him.

"We shouldn't be lying on the ground. It's dirty and we could get sick since it's raining after all." His voice whispered in my ear.

"I suppose you are right but, I just love looking at the starts so damn much." I said as I turned to face him.

"Silly Bella. You can look at the stars every night. They won't ever go away and even if you can't see them sometimes they're still there." Jasper said smugly his breath tickling me.

"I know that but, I still like looking at them. And they're even more beautiful when it's raining." I said loudly getting up.

I looked down at Jasper and he was looking up at me imploringly. His beauty hit me like a ton of bricks and left me breathless. How would I ever get used to him? I wanted to shout that he was more beautiful to me than the stars were but, I kept my mouth closed and offered him a hand instead. I pulled him up quickly but I lost my balance and fell into his hard chest. I almost knocked us both over stupid, clumsy me.

"Careful there, Bells. We just got off the ground; we don't need to go back down there." His voice rumbled in my ear sending thrills through my body.

I blushed mortification and just nodded dumbly. We continued on our way towards the playground in silence. I was busy thinking and Jasper was busy texting someone. Most likely Alice. My suspicions were confirmed as we neared.

"Alice has an audition for some commercial tomorrow." He began.

Oh great more about Alice the wonder girlfriend. She was rich and had an agent for acting. She was shorter than I was with short black hair that was styled in spiky disarray. She was thin in the extreme and very fashionable. She had big hazel eyes and I had to admit that she was very pretty. I struggled for a normal tone as I answered him.

"Oh what's she auditioning for this time?" I asked. I didn't really care but, I liked hearing him talk.

"I don't know. I don't even think she really knows her agent just tells her when she has an audition."

"Huh. Well hopefully she gets something fun." I said effectively ending this topic.

I saw the saucer swings in the park and I sprinted towards them. I absolutely loved saucer swings even though I didn't know why. I quickly hopped in the middle one crossing my legs. Jasper sat in one to my right iphone in hand. Still texting his stupid girlfriend. God, did everything have to involve her. This was Jasper and Bella time after all and I wished he wouldn't ruin it by constantly bringing her up. I started glumly in the distance as silence settled over us. I was thinking about another time a few years before when I had come here with Jasper. I had just started grade ten and Jazzy grade eight. We called each other Batman and Robin then. I naturally was batman and Jasper was Robin. We had been on another night time adventure only we weren't out as late. It was only maybe 10:30. I was wearing Jaspers soccer jacket because I had left my own at Rosalies house. We were just talking and laughing. We'd only known each other for about 3 months at the time but, already we were extremely close. We were talking pictures and sitting on the cement when I had the strong desire to just kiss him. I didn't act on it because back then the age and grade difference had mattered to me. So in the end I just went home and forgot all about it. Months later though Jasper told me that he wanted to kiss me that night too. I was surprised but he was dating Alice already and I was with Edward.. Alice and Jasper had an on again, off again relationship. I didn't really realize that I had feeling for him other than friendship though. No my feelings were a more recent realization. Jaspers voice brought me out of my thoughts as he asked me a question.

"What's something you've always wanted to do Bells?" his voice was soft.

"I don't know. Usually when I want to do something I just go and do it." I answered truthfully.

I thought about something I've always wanted to do and answered the question better.

'I've always wanted to fly. Not like in a plane or anything but, actually fly as if I had wings or something."

"Something that isn't impossible." He mocked.

"Hey you didn't say it had to be possible just something that I've always wanted to do. But, I guess we could go with I've always wanted to try Shrooms or LSD." I said wondering if I should've kept that to myself.

"Why would you even want to try those things Bella? They're just stupid. Sometimes I wonder why you do the things you do. I know you're self-destructive but, you could really end up getting hurt. You've done ecstasy, oxycontin and you smoke pot. You've slit your wrists and other parts of your body. Why are you like this sometimes? Wait don't answer. I already know. It's because of _him_. I can't believe you still think about him." Jasper said scornfully.

I flinched back at the venom in his voice. He usually wasn't so mean when he spoke about things I've done. I can't believe he brought Edward up though. He knew I hated talking about it even now.

"I don't want to do shrooms or LSD because of _him_. I want to do them because I heard they were fun! I can't believe you sometimes. I'm never not going to be able to think about him. He's the start of my nightmares all the time as you very well know. If you're going to be such a dick then I might as well go home. I don't need this shit." I seethed while trying to hold back tears.

He looked at me in shock. Usually if people upset me I just kept it to myself instead of calling them out. I wasn't one for drama. If Jasper was going to be an assnut though well then he could just go fuck him self. I didn't want to hear him say the things that I knew were true. I was pathetic and useless. I was also mad though. He knew Edward was a subject that was off limits. Just his name sent waves of fear, hurt and anger through me. I hoped I didn't start cutting again. My anger made me a bitch though and so I lashed out at Jasper who was still looking at me in surprise.

"Take a picture, it lasts longer Jazzy." I whispered bitterly my moth twisting unpleasantly as I struggled to spit the words out.

I watched as hurt crossed his face. I smiled cruelly in satisfaction at his pain. He deserved to hurt for hurting me. Guilt crept in though but, it was too late to take the words back. They were already out there.

"Awe don't be like that Bella. You know I was just being an asshole for no reason. I'm sorry. Don't leave yet. How bout we go to McDonalds and I'll buy you some nuggets?" he suggested temptingly.

The bastard knew I loved McDonalds and their chicken nuggets. They were just so damn good and those fries. It was like a little slice of heaven. I grudgingly agreed and Jasper and I set off towards McDonalds. It would have been easier to drive but, I liked walking with Jasper. It meant more time with him even if he was texting Alice constantly. The rain started to come down faster and harder though and the wind picked up a bit. I was glad I had on a sweater and pants. Maybe we should've driven though. It was dark as we walked through the city. I turned my cell phone on and started texting Angela. It was late out but, I knew she'd be up. She had Jessica over so I didn't talk to her for too long.

The moon was bright as we approached a dark path. There were trees around so it was even darker. I stalked into the darkness and Jasper followed beside me. I began to hum quietly along to Starstruckk by 3OH!3 as it started playing on my ipod. Jazz laughed quietly beside me. He introduced the song to me when we were younger. It was still a favorite of mine. The trees thinned quickly and soon we were walking up a hill. As we were walking Jasper decided to talk to me again.

"Me and Alice haven't kissed in so long. It's starting to piss us both off." He started off.

"Oh well why not?" I answered him hoping he'd catch the sarcasm. He didn't.

"Well we haven't had anytime to ourselves really and we don't like kissing in public." He stated.

"Why don't you guys make plans then that involve the two of you?" I asked as if it were the most obvious thing in the world.

"We did. This Saturday we're hanging out. So it'll be two horny children all alone." He laughed.

"That's lovely. I don't need a mental picture Jazzy." I said acidly.

"I thought you liked stuff like that." He answered me.

I looked at him in shock.

"You think that I enjoy horny children!?" When he just nodded I continued lustily. "Well I don't like horny children but, horny older guys I do enjoy."

He laughed at that but there was something off about it. Just like his expression. It was guarded. I decided to try and get Jasper to tell me something that he always refused to tell me.

"So Jazzy old boy, are you going to tell me how far you've gone yet?"

"Nope." He said popping the 'p'.

"Awe why not. I tell you everything! I even told you about the time with the whipped cream and chains. And still you won't even tell me if you've gone farther than making out. I can't believe you sometimes." I whined.

We told each other everything but, he wouldn't tell me how far he'd gone. It was starting to piss me off to no end. So much for being besties. I felt a scowl on my face.

"Bella, it's not important."

"Fine." I huffed and stomped off to where McDonalds was.

We had to walk through the drive-thru which was something I always enjoyed. Jasper ordered for me and when it arrived we went in sat in a bus shelter thing. You know those plastic things with the little bench in them. I ate my nuggets in silence. I was still a little hurt about Jasper not telling me. I didn't understand why he wouldn't tell me. Why the reluctance? Jasper was looking at me with a smile on his face while he ate his big mac. I frowned at him and looked away while I munched on a fry. Jasper noticing my mood leaned in close to me and wrapped his long arms around my shoulders. He rested his head on one shoulder. His hair tickled me and my breathing sped up. I tried to wriggle free but, he just held on tighter. It was no use, he was too strong. I was trapped. I gave up and he started to speak.

"Bellie, don't be mad at me. I know we tell each other everything but, this isn't important." He started. I grimaced at the use of my nickname that Emmett had given me.

I just munched on another fry and tried to ignore him but, it was really hard as he was wrapped around me with his lips by my neck.

"Awe c'mon. You're being irrational here." He whispered with his famous puppy dog eyes. I had practice in resisting though.

"No I'm not. We tell each other everything Jazzy and you won't tell me this. I know maybe I'm reacting a little bit but, we're supposed to be best friends. I tell you whatever you want." I said angrily.

"Darlin' we are best friends. And I know you tell me everything but, I'm sure you have some stuff you keep from me. Besides, what if I promise to tell you one day. Maybe not today or the next but, someday I'll let you know." His southern accent was more pronounced when he was upset.

The situation with my body though was about to get out of hand. I loved when he called me darling with that cute accent of his. The proximity of his body though combined with his raspy husky voice was going to make me do something I'd regret. My pupils had dilated and my breath came shuddering out. This was bad.

"Fine, Jasper. I don't keep anything from you but, if you promise to tell me sometime then I guess I could stop being mad at you." I said praying he wouldn't hear the lust in my voice. He didn't.

He exhaled softly against my skin and I almost moaned. God damn it. I hoped he would let go at the same time that I wished he would hold on to me forever. I really hated myself sometimes. I made an excuse about wanting to finish my food and gently shrugged his arms off. He removed his arms and head from my body slowly. He seemed almost reluctant but, that was impossible. It's not like he cared that much about holding me. We finished eating in comfortable silence and my body calmed down. We started on our way back but, this time we took a different way that led us through more dark paths. No hills though. I decided to tell Jasper about my plans for when after I graduated. I had talked about them with him on an occasion but, now I was pretty sure about what I was going to do.

"So Jazz I have finalized my plan for what I'm going to do after high school." I said excitedly.

"Oh and what are you going to do?" he asked me. He didn't sound very enthused.

"Well, first Alec, Jane and I are going to go to New York for a few weeks. Everything is being paid for by Jane and Alec's rich uncle Aro. Man is he ever loaded. He's a little creepy but, generally okay. Plus he buys me everything." I began.

I had a flashback of the time that I became a part of the Volturi family. My parents had died in a car accident and I had no where to go. I had no other family left alive. My best friend Jane though asked her dad, Marcus if I could live with them. He agreed and everything was taken care of. Marcus though was depressed. His wife had died when Alec and Jane were younger. They were very rich and it was nice there. I missed my parents a bit but, it was okay. We had all moved out here about 8 years ago. Me and Jane had stopped being close for awhile too but, we had started to become better friends again now that I didn't hang out with Rosalie so much. I came back to the present and finished telling Jasper my plans.

"After that, I'm going on a visit to Australia for a bit. I want to see if it's the right place to live. If it is then I'm going to get a job. I've always wanted to be a black jack dealer so that's probably what I'll do. I know I'm loaded and everything but, I don't want my adoptive family to have to pay for everything. It will be nice to be a bit independent. After about a year I'll either decide to go to university or I'll just move to Aussie country with Jane and Alec. You see, they want to live out there too. That's pretty much it." I finished out of breath from talking so much.

"Sounds like a good plan but, I think you haven't figured everything out." Jasper said mockingly.

"Well it will be two years before I move away so that means I can watch you graduate and everything. Unless you don't want me there anymore. Maybe we won't even be friends anymore by then. Who knows?" I said sadly.

"I'm sure we'll still be friends and I'd be honored to have you at my grad. If I'm not dating anyone than you can be my date." He said.

"Alright. Wanna be my date for grad? I mean if no one asks me or anything?" I asked hopefully.

"Of course, Bellie."

It started to rain more. I wasn't too happy. I didn't like being extremely wet. The good thing was though that we were almost at Jaspers house. I felt like watching a movie before I made my way home. Like he was reading my mind, Jasper asked me to stay and watch The Watchmen. I agreed excitedly. I loved that movie. We climbed up his trellis and onto his roof quickly. We were stealthy as we crept over the shingles and slid through the window and into his bedroom. I laid down in his bed quickly pulling the covers over me. Jasper went to go to the bathroom. He came back into the room and pulled on his pajamas. I tried not to look but, it wasn't as if I hadn't seen him changing before. He was pale and lean. His muscles were flexing as he pulled on his pants and then his shirt. I stared at the long scar that stretched from the underneath of his ribs and into his boxers. It was lighter than the rest of him. I remembered how he got it. He was protecting me. I longed to lick the scar. I was sad that he had it but, pleased that I had also gotten one the same night. Mine wasn't as big and it was on my lower back. It wasn't as noticeable as Jaspers was. Jasper had gotten more than the big scar though. His chest was flecked with smaller marks as was his back. I glanced away from Jasper before he could catch my staring. He hopped into bed beside ma and pulled my close. I rested my head on his shoulder as he started the movie. I was trembling though. The memory of that night were Jasper and I had got our scars still gave me nightmares. My best friend and boyfriend at the time had given them to us. Edward.

* * *

_I had become friends with Edward when I first moved here. We quickly became inseparable. We were closer than Jasper and I are. We had no secrets and knew every little detail about each other. Edward was beautiful with bright green eyes. They looked like lime popsicles. He had bronze hair that was always a mess but, it just added to his charm. He was tall and lanky and perfect. Even his attitude was perfect. He played the piano expertly and he was going to become a doctor. He was brilliant and he was my best fiend. After a few years we had dated. Everything was perfect for a few years until, I found out that he had been cheating on me with someone. I later realized that the girl he had been cheating on me with was Tanya. A gorgeous strawberry blonde with huge boobs. Seriously these things could have there own gravitational pull. I was furious with him but, I still loved him so much. I ended up breaking up with him though and I refused to talk to him for a year. Eventually though I started to talk to him again. I thought that maybe we could become best friends again. We did because we were Edward and Bella, Best friends for life. Of course it was natural when we started developing feelings again for each other and once again we became more than friends. This time though there was no cheating on me but, towards the end of grade ten he became different. He was meaner and tended to lash out at me for no reason. One time I called him to ask if he wanted to do anything and he went psycho on me. He told me that I was a whore and that I destroyed the life of everyone around me. I was useless. I was only good for one thing and I still hadn't given it to him. Sex. He wanted to have sex with me. I thought it was a reasonable request but, I still wasn't ready. He called me a prude and told me that he'd be better off with out me. I hung up in tears. I was hysterical and I refused to talk to anyone. Jasper had to come over one day and he knocked some sense into me. I decided to stop hiding in my room. Edward called me and apologized a few days later for his behavior. Like the fool I was I accepted him back into my life. He still wasn't as nice as he used to be but, I got used to his odd cruelty. I would love him forever. Even if he was an abusive bastard I'd still stick with him. He was my everything. I tried to do other things for him that wouldn't involve sex. One time I stripped off his clothes and handcuffed him to his bed. I blindfolded him and put on a dominatrix outfit. I then covered him in whipped cream and proceeded to lick it off him. Another time I used a whip. I thought things were good. I started to drink and do drugs more often. Edward came over to my house almost every night and we would get high or drink together. _

_On one night I got shit faced and I couldn't remember anything. Edward told me that we had sex that night. I was shocked and upset that I couldn't remember my first time. I was so upset that I wouldn't sleep with him again. After a few weeks of trying to get me to have sex with him Edward flew into one of his rages. He told me that he had lied about us having sex because he thought that If I believed that I had already done it then I would do it again. But, he was wrong. I was nothing but a useless skank to him and he deserved better. I kicked him out of my house for that and told him not to come back. About a week later he arrived at more door one night. He was carrying some flowers. As soon as he saw me he crushed his lips to mine and told me how sorry he was and how much he loved me. I told him to get the fuck out of my house and I threw a bowl at him. He dodged it and it shattered against the wall. He left then after promising me that this wasn't over. I told him that it was. I ran to my room and sobbed on my bed. I hated myself at that moment. I hated that I loved him and I hated what he had become. So thinking that it was my fault I started to slit my wrists and across my ribs and the inside of my thighs. I was scarred on the inside so why not show it on the outside. I was depressed and not Jasper, Jane or Rosalie could help me. _

_A few weeks after the incident at my house with Edward, I finally left my house and went shopping. It was getting late when I finally decided to go home. The parking lot was empty as I crossed and I was on the phone with Jasper when I felt someone grab me from behind. I shrieked and dropped the phone but, it was still on. I was spun around was met with Edwards face. He looked terrible and I was afraid of him. He noted this and laughed cruelly. _

"_E-e-edward?" I managed to stutter out._

"_Yes Bella?" He said coldly._

"_What do you want?'" I asked._

'_That's all I get? Not even a 'it's nice to see you' or a 'how are you doing.' Well I'll answer you're question but, you already know the answer. What I want is you Bella dear. You're always the only thing I ever want." I hissed._

_I started to back away but, he caught me. I screamed his name and yelled for help but, no one heard me. He threw me in my own car and started to drive away. I prayed that he would take me to his house and not some place far away where no one could find me. It looked like my prayers were answered because soon we were pulling into his driveway. I exhaled in relief but my breathing was cut short as I noticed the look on his face. He was looking at me in disgust and hate. My one thought was if looks could kill before I blacked out. _

_When I awoke I noticed that I was in Edwards room on his bed. His parents must be out. Edward was sitting beside me looking down at me. When he saw that I was awake his face twisted grotesquely. _

"_Ahh I see you're finally awake. Now we can get down to business." He sneered. I shrunk back in fear._

"_W-w-what do you mean?" _

"_Well Bella tonight is the night where you and I finally have sex for the first time. I hope you go along with it. I wouldn't want to have to tie you up. It would be more pleasurable for you if you are agreeing." He said softly. The terrible look was still on his face though._

"_Oh no Edward I really couldn't."_

"_Yes you could Bella. Well you'll have to because one way or another I'll get what I want." His voice was cold and as he brushed his hand across my cheek it took everything I had not to flinch away._

_I came up with the plan that if I pretended to want this then maybe he would let his guard down and I would be able to escape. I saw my eyes on his bedside table. I just had to make sure that I could play along well enough._

"_Alright, you were right. I want this more than anything. I refused you because I was afraid of being called a slut and because I was afraid that once we had sex you would leave me." I whispered breathlessly. He seemed to believe me and his feature softened slightly._

"_You know you really hurt my feelings love but, we can get over it." He said smiling a crooked smile that once I loved and now only made me feel sick._

"_I'm glad." I responded as I stretched up to kiss him. _

_He responded to me soon his fingers were threaded through my hair. He pushed me back onto the bed and hovered over me. He slowly pulled my top off and he gripped my breasts so tight that it hurt. I whimpered in pain. He pulled his own shirt off and brought his lips back to mine. My fingers dug into his back as his hands squeezed my hips. He kissed down my jaw and bit down on my neck. It wasn't exactly a gentle bite and I hissed. He started to undo my pants and then pulled them down. He pushed my panties aside and roughly thrust his fingers into my. I gasped loudly._

"_Why aren't you wet yet dear?" he hissed in my ear. He ran his teeth down my ear and bit on the lobe. I arched up against him in pain but, he thought it was in pleasure. _

_He pumped his fingers in and out of me painfully. I screamed and scratched along his back with my nails. He moved his mouth to my breasts and bit my right nipple through my bra's thin material. Pain. I was in pain. I noticed my chance though and I moved one hand off his back and grabbed the metal lamp that won on his bedside table. I moaned in pretense like I was enjoying his finger inside me. I felt him smile against my breasts and then I brought the lamp down on his head as hard as I could. He groaned and I pushed him off me as fast as I could. I grabbed my car keys and ran. His house was big though and Edwards room was on the top floor. I left my clothes in his room. I sped down the first flight of stairs and I heard him coming after me. The lamp had not knocked him out as I had hoped. I tripped on the hall way and slid across the floor where I slammed into the wall painfully. I saw black spots dance across my vision and I heard Edwards musical voice calling for me. I tried to get up but, I hurt everywhere._

"_Bellllaaa, Where are you? Bellaaa." He called. I tried to breathe evenly as I slowly started to crawl across the floor to the next flight of stairs. He spotted me though as he came into my line of vision. I saw that he had a knife. A big long hunting knife. I started to cry._

"_Ah there you are. You know that wasn't very nice of you. I think it might leave a bruise." He said nastily as he crouched down beside me._

_I just stared up at him with tears sliding down my cheeks._

"_You know you're so lovely when you cry. You should do it more often. But, do you know what I like better than you crying. I like it better when you scream. So scream for me Bella and then we can get back to where we left off." _

_I refused to scream for him and then He brought the knife up close to his face and he kissed it gently. I knew what was going to happen. _

"_No! D-don't do this. Please." I croaked out. Tears coming faster._

_He ignored me and just whispered once more 'Scream'. And when he brought the knife down and onto my back I did. I scream loudly and painfully trying to get away from him as blood poured onto the floor. I prayed that I would black out. Anything to escape the situation. I screamed and screamed and screamed even as he ripped the knife free from my body. _

"_Ahh beautiful, tragic, innocent Bella. Don't you know dear it's just you and me and no one is here to hear you scream. Well except for you but, soon I'll have you withering and screaming in pleasure and then when I'm done I'll kill you." He whispered coldly._

_I saw it in his eyes. He was speaking the truth. He would rape me and then murder me. I just screamed louder and tried unsuccessfully to get away. He grabbed my neck in his hands and rolled me onto my back. I heard him whisper in my ear._

"_Keep screaming if you want but, there's no one here to help."_

_He was wrong though. Far away in a parking lot of a mall there was a cell phone on the ground. The call had ended long ago but, before it had the person on the other end heard a scream and a name: Edward. To any other person this would probably mean nothing but, to Jasper it meant everything._

_Jasper burst into the house and ran up the stairs. He didn't even know if she'd be here. He wasn't sure what to expect if they were here but, he definitely didn't expect the sight that met his eyes. He saw his best friend Bella Swan lying in a pool of her own blood, screaming with tears streaming down her face. He saw Edward bending over here kissing her chest and down her stomach. He saw the bloody knife lying on the ground beside them. Edward saw Jasper just as Jasper lunged for the weapon. Edward was too fast though and he got the knife first. _

_Just as Jasper reached him Edward slashed down but, not towards me. Instead he slashed a deep long gash down Jaspers stomach. Blood poured all over, spilling onto the floor. Jasper fell to his knees and received more slashes to the chest. These weren't so bad though but, still he fell over right next to me. He landed on his stomach and Edward gave him a few more cuts along his back for good measure before dropping the knife and turning his attention back to me. I had finally stopped screaming and was staring at Jasper in shock. His eyes were glazing over but, he was still breathing. I looked back up at Edward as he once again proceeded to rape me. I was disgusted. There was blood everywhere. It was like a horror film and still he wanted to have sex with me, the girl bleeding on the floor. I saw the knife and grabbed it tightly. I looked into Edwards eyes. They were unfocused and he was breathing heavily. I smiled at him and drove the knife into his neck. More blood. Everything was red. The corpse of the person who once held my heart fell on top of me. I pushed it off and forced my limbs to work. I staggered off the ground and stumbled to where the closest phone was. I collapsed against the wall sliding down and leaving a trail of blood. I dialed 911 and when a girl's voice answered asking me what the emergency was I closed me eyes._

"_Just help me please." I whispered._

"_What's the address?" she asked._

"_It's-" I started to say before I couldn't hold back the darkness any longer. I let it drag me down hoping that when I woke it would all just be a bad dream._

_I woke up in the hospital. I had machines hooked up to me and I ached all over. I looked around and realized that Jasper was in the bed next to mine. He looked so pale and fragile. I thought maybe he'd died. That thought made my heart start to pound erratically until I noticed the beeping of a heart monitor. Jasper was okay. His heart rate was slow and weak but, he was okay. I fell back asleep. _

_They told me later that I had killed Edward. It was in self defense though and I wouldn't have to go to court. They only thing I could think of though was Jasper almost died trying to save me. It was then that I realized that I was in love with him. I knew that he wasn't anything like Edward and so I could still hang around him without being scared. He had Alice though. Jasper helped more than anything or anyone. He helped me learn to trust people again. I hadn't had a single relationship with anyone though since Edward. It had only been a bit longer than a year though since that night. I had time. _

* * *

I didn't realize that I had started crying and that Jasper was holding me and rocking my back and forth gently as he tried to calm me down. My tears were silent as they streamed down my face and I buried my face into Jaspers chest. Thinking about it brought back all the pain and terror. Like I told Jasper I would never be able to forget about that evening. I had nightmares about it almost every night. At least I had stopped screaming out loud when I had them.

"Shhh Bella. It's okay. He's gone now. He can't ever hurt you or anyone else again." Jasper mumbled into my hair as he rubbed my back soothingly.

I don't know how long I cried for but, eventually I fell asleep curled up against Jasper.

* * *

_Well I'm crying out, wash my hands these bloody hands Lord,  
Open my mouth and I'll sing,_

_I'm falling more in love with every single word I withhold  
I'm falling more in love with every single word you say  
I'm falling head over heels for you._

_--My Beautiful Rescue This Providence_

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**Well there you have the first chapter. What do you think? Read and Review.  
**

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	2. Nightmares And Tickle Wars

**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight**

**Chapter 2- Nightmares and Tickle Wars**

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_I just wanna run to you,  
And break off the chains,  
And throw them away  
I just wanna be so much,  
And shake off the dust that turned me to rust  
Sooner than later, I'll need a savior  
I'll need a savior..._

_--Savior;; Lights_

* * *

_It was night time and I was floating in the ocean. The cool salty water gently lapping at my skin as I drifted peacefully. The moon was full and bright and made my skin glow slightly. I sighed and kicked my feet lightly propelling myself forward. I was content but, something seemed off. Why was I in an ocean all alone? Wouldn't it make more sense if I had at least one more person with me? After all I wasn't a very strong swimmer. I flipped myself around and began to tread water nervously. Suddenly the ocean didn't seem so peaceful anymore. It seemed dark, dangerous and full of secrets locked away in its watery depths. I looked around in dismay. I was in the middle of an ocean with land no where in sight. How could I have been so foolish to swim so far out? At least the water was calm and not rough with waves. I wasn't in danger of drowning yet. Then just as I was beginning to relax, something brushed across my leg. I yelped and spun around frantically looking for a sign of what had touched me. I got no answers. The water was as still and dark as ever. Again my leg was brushed by some unknown thing. I started to splash my way through the water as fast as I could. Then faster than I could comprehend I was yanked under. I gasped getting a mouthful of seawater. I quickly closed my mouth and looked around. The water was filled with light that flickered and pulsed from a source unknown. It was a yellow color which turned the water to green. There was something locked around my ankle and when I looked down I fought to hold in an ear shattering scream. _

_There dragging me down deeper was Edward. His neck was sewn up and a gruesome smile was stretched across his once handsome face. He was pale with dark purple circles under his eyes and when those eyes opened they were blue-gray. No longer were they the bright green that I once loved, but the sunken eyes of a corpse that stared lifelessly into mine promising revenge. This time I couldn't hold in my shriek and only bubbles escaped my lips before water was pushed into my mouth and down my throat. I quickly closed my mouth and struggled to get away. I kicked my feet and looked skyward but the moon and ocean top were getting farther and farther away. I glanced back at Edward and saw him looking at me, amusement lighting his dead eyes. Black was dancing across my vision and my mind was becoming foggy as Edward slowly carried me down. I fought to keep oxygen in my lungs and my mind screamed: "HELP!" but there was no one around. We were in the middle of the ocean after all. Just when I was about to give up and let the unforgiving water have me something caught my attention. It was Edwards's expression. He was wearing a fearsome expression of hate but, he wasn't looking at me. He was looking above me. I turned my head and my heart skipped a beat. I saw Jasper swimming towards me just as Edward and I reached the sandy bottom. _

_Jasper reached us and knocked Edward aside and grabbed me around my middle just as I was blacking out. He kicked hard off the ocean bottom and my last thought was that everything would be okay because Jasper was here._

I woke up drenched in sweat and breathing heavily. I looked around wildly. I had no idea where I was. A sound to my right sent my head spinning and when I saw who it was I gasped in relief. It was Jasper.

It was then that I noticed where I was. I was in Jaspers room. I must've fallen asleep here but, it was no biggie. I was allowed to stay over at Jaspers whenever I wanted. I remembered my dream and shuddered. It was a nightmare like always. I lay back down and tried to calm my breathing. My head turned to the side and to my surprise a bright gray eye was staring into mine. I noticed all the colors that made up Jaspers gray eye. Yellow and blue towards the pupil. Green, hazel and gray making up all the rest. It was stunning, just like him.

"Hey, sorry if I woke you up. It was just a nightmare, nothing special. Just go back to sleep" I whisper.

"Okay. Come here though. I'll help you fall back asleep first." Jasper said. His voice groggy with sleep.

I crawled over to Jasper and snuggled into the arms he held open for me. He started running his fingers up and down my back and through my hair putting me in a relaxed state and then he started singing in my ear softly.

"_I'm not one for love songs. The way I'm living makes you feel like giving up but, you don't and I want everything for you. But disappointment 'cause you've been left behind. And the world has its shine,_

_I would drop it on a dime for you"_ His voice was beautiful even when it was rough with sleep and I was falling quickly back into unconsciousness.

"_And whatever it takes. I'm gonna make my way home. We can turn our backs on the past and start over…"_

That was the last thing I heard before I was asleep. It seemed like Jasper was trying to convey something to me but, I was too tired to try and puzzle it out. I snuggled in closer and closed my eyes. This time while wrapped in Jaspers arms there were no dreams to bother my sleep.

I woke up feeling refreshed and invigorated. I tried to stretch but something was making it hard to move around properly. I looked and to my surprise I saw that Jasper and I were all wrapped around each other. Usually when I woke up he had moved away from me after I fell asleep. This was different and I quite enjoyed it although the position we were in was a little improper and were Alice here I'm sure she'd disapprove greatly. My legs were all tangled up in Jaspers and I had wrapped my arms around his bare middle putting us as close as possible. And Jaspers hands were under my shirt and on the bare skin of my back while his face was buried in my neck. This close proximity sent my heartbeat rocketing out of control and I gasped and tried to calm myself before I ripped off Jazzys pants. After a few minutes I had regained some control and got use to the close position although every little move Jazz made caused my heart to skip a beat and tingles to travel through my body. I took a deep breath and was assaulted by the delicious smell of Jasper. He smelled like forgotten spices and warm sunny days with just a hint of rain lingering in the distance. It caused my mouth to water and I wondered what he tasted like. I wanted to kiss him so bad that it hurt. I bit the inside of my mouth to distract my naughty thoughts.

I noticed then that I was very hot. Uncomfortably so. Jasper was like a sauna and he was heating up my body. I was usually under normal human temperature so this warmth felt alien to me. I wriggled trying to get cool air on myself and that was when Jazz started to wake up.

Jasper snuggled in closer and moved his head so that our lips were just inches apart. My breathing sped up and I sighed longingly. And then before I knew what was happening his eyes had half opened, his fingers were twisted in my hair and I was rolled underneath him. Then in a flash his lips were on mine and I couldn't control my reaction. I grabbed his hair in my fists and gasped wildly. His mouth pushed mine open and then it was over. I kept my eyes closed and whimpered in disappointment. Jasper now fully awake mistook my whine for fear though and I felt his hand gently touch my cheek.

"Bella, don't be afraid. It's Jasper. I'm so sorry; I don't know what came over me like that. I wasn't thinking at all. Please open your eyes." He whispered sadly.

I kept my eyes closed though and tried to calm my breathing and figure out what Jasper was talking about. I understood quickly. He hadn't meant to kiss me. He probably thought it was Alice he was kissing. As if he'd ever kiss me and now he thought I was afraid of him. At least he gave me a good reason to get out of the situation without revealing my feelings.

"Darlin' answer me. It's not Edward. It's Jasper and you know I'd never hurt you." He continued.

He already had hurt me though he just didn't know it. Everyday he hurt me without realizing it. His being with Alice is what hurt me. I sighed once and slowly opened my eyes. I was met with Jaspers mismatched gaze. His expression was worried and I was quick to reassure him.

"I know you'd never hurt me Jazz. Sorry for over reacting like that. My mind was still pretty foggy with sleep. I didn't mean to scare you." I lied.

"Ahh Bellie it's not your fault. It's mine. I was caught in-between sleep and awake and I thought that you were- I thought- thought that you were Alice." He said but something was off and his expression was guarded.

I let it go though and looked at the clock. It was 11:11, time to make a wish.

"It's fine but it's time to make a wish!" I exclaimed.

He chuckled quietly and his eyes turned thoughtful. I made my wish and it was obviously wishing that Jasper was mine. I was curious about his though so I asked him even though I was pretty sure he wouldn't tell me.

"So Jazz will you tell me what your wish was about?" I asked.

"If I told you it wouldn't come true." He responded slyly.

"Oh please! Pretty, pretty please with a cherry on top!"

"No Bella. I really want this to come true and once it does I will tell you. I promise" He said.

"Alright, fine. I'll wait then." I said with faux disappointment.

Jasper saw right through my little act and gently pushed me over, except for I ended up falling off the bed and the ground was very cold.

"Ahhh! So cold! I hate you, Jasper!" I huffed.

He just chuckled and burrowed himself under the covers. I climbed back up onto the bed, grabbed a pillow and planned my attack. I waited for his eyes to close and then when he had relaxed and stopped waiting for me to attack, I pounced. I leaped from my sitting position so that I was flying towards him but, Jasper was not as relaxed as he appeared. Just as I was about to land on him and put a pillow over his face Jasper, opened his eyes and grabbed me, flipping me over so that now I was the one being smothered. I flailed around trying to get him off but, he was too strong. I gave up and went limp underneath him. I purposely made my breathing loud and labored and hoped that he'd think I was suffocating. He fell for it and the pressure on the pillow was lowered and soon there was no pillow at all. I opened my eyes and stared into Jaspers. This was my chance while he was watching my face I stealthily moved my hands and grabbed his hips and began to tickle him. Jasper was very ticklish, you see. He began to giggle and squirm as I ruthlessly tickled him until finally I was freed from underneath him. He rolled away and tried to catch his breath.

"Now Bella darlin' that… was not… very… nice." Jasper panted out.

"On the contrary Jasper, I think it was appropriate given the situation." I responded formally.

"And what type of situation is that? If I may ask." He played along.

"Well if you look at the facts you will see that you started it by pushing me on the floor. I had to retaliate and then you ruined that so tickling was the only thing left for me to do." I said like I regretted it while giving him a wicked smile.

"Well that makes sense I guess but, Bella, you forgot a few very important things."

"And those are?" I asked curiously.

"Well firstly I'm bigger than you. Secondly, I like to win and thirdly, you're ticklish too!" He said right as he pounced with his fingers outstretched.

I tried to dodge him but being the klutz that I am; I ended up falling to the floor with Jasper landing right on top of me. My breath left my lungs in a big gasp and then without even giving me time to recover Jasper began lightly moving his fingers across my stomach and ribs. Damn him, he knew that light tickling was the worst. I laughed and bucked my hip trying to get away. My hands were trapped so I couldn't even try to get him back.

"Jasper… Stop… Haha… Jasperrr." I panted out my sentence punctured with breathless giggles.

He moved his lips to my ear and whispered roughly.

"You know what you have to say to make me stop."

"Never. I will not say… it." I protested.

"Fine then have it your way." He said and kept right on going.

"Alright fine…" I said and then muttered something unintelligibly.

"What was that Bella? Louder please." He laughed.

"Jasper is the most awesome of all. I'm just a puny weakling and he rules. I have to be his slave for the day." I huffed out angrily. He always won.

He stopped and then looked down at me. Unknown emotions swirling in his eyes as he stared into mine. Then a huge grin broke across his face and he helped me up.

"Slave for the day, huh? What should I make you do first?" he wondered aloud.

"Uhmm, sing you to sleep?" I suggested hopefully. I was still a little tired.

"Naah, I'm not tired anymore."

Damnit. Looks like no more sleep for today.

"How bout you get me a sandwich?" He suggested.

That sounded easy so I shrugged and walked out of the room. I sighed; today was going to be a very long day.

* * *

_We'll head south, _

_Just hold my hand now,_

_I feel like I'm casting off my clothes, _

_And I'm running through the snow towards the sunset, _

_Where I'm always with you._

_--Farewell to the Fairground;; White Lies_

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**Authors Note: Hey everyone, Just wanted to tell you that I am so sorry for the long wait. My computer crashed and I had to wait for my dad to get back from outta town to fix it. Unfortunately all the memory was erased so I have to rewrite everything. There will now be more chapters to this story they will just be shorter than originally planned. So again I'm really sorry for not updating sooner. The song that Jasper sings to Bella is: The World Has It's Shine [but I'd drop it on a dime] by Cobra Starship.**

**Review please.**

**Love,**

**Jenna.**


	3. Ecstasy

**Here's chapter 3 of Light up the sky. Sorry about the wait. Read and review please.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own twilight. It all belongs to Stephanie meyer.**

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**Chapter 3- Ecstasy**

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_Empty house far away  
Lost in lonely space  
You know you've felt the same  
From the shallows in love  
To the depths of your scars  
You know you want to change_

_--Fearless (250 and dark stars);; Falling up  
_

* * *

"BELLA!?" Jasper yells from his room.

I sigh and run from the basement to his bedroom with Transformers 2: Rise of The Fallen clutched tightly in hand. I push my hair back from my face and glare at Jasper.

"Yes?" I ask sweetly.

"Make sure you remember to make some popcorn. Add butter too." He says slyly.

I bite back a scream, practically throw Transformers at him, and turn on my heel, marching angrily towards the kitchen. He was taking the whole "slave for a day" thing way too far. So far, I had made him a sandwich, walked his dog, cleaned his room and bathroom, fed his cats; done his laundry and now I had grabbed him his movie and was going to make him some popcorn. I was exhausted and in the worst possible mood. If Jasper wasn't careful he was going to find my hands wrapped tightly around his neck, very soon. I clomped down the stairs and into the kitchen and readied the popcorn maker adding the seeds. I groaned and leaned wearily against the counter. Something butted against my leg and I looked around. There was Jaspers German Shepherd, Max. He was just a little puppy and the cutest thing ever. I loved him to bits and often plotted ways to make him mine. I leaned down to pet him and he ended up jumping into my face and giving me slobbery kisses.

"Eww Max! Gross! No kisses!" I squealed happily.

He ignores me and keeps kissing my face anyways so I pick him up and cuddled him for a minute. The sound of popping corn stopped and I sigh and put Max back down on the ground. I put some butter in the microwave and when it was sufficiently melted I poured it over the popcorn and stirred it up. I grabbed the bowl and was just about to head back upstairs when I heard a low whine. I looked around and saw Max staring at me then he sat up on his hind legs just begging to be picked up. So I did and me, Max and the popcorn went back upstairs to the slave master.

When I reached Jaspers room I noticed that he had already put the movie in but, it was still on the main menu. I put Max down on the bed, where he made himself right at home, and handed the popcorn to Jasper. I stood up and crossed my arms and looked down grumpily at Jasper.

"So, what should I do now?" I asked him.

He smiles innocently up at me and pats the space beside him. I humor him and sit down, He put his arm around me and I lean into his side.

"You're next task is to have hot, sweaty, wild sex with me." He states.

I pulled away and looked at him warily not sure what my face must've looked like, he stared back and his serious expression soon fell away and he began to laugh. I soon joined in and he tried to talk but, couldn't quite manage it.

"Oh god Bella! You should've seen your face… it was like… I don't even know!" He managed to choke out.

"Oh my god! I know, Right?" I said.

And soon we were laughing uncontrollably again. Secretly, I wished that he hadn't been joking though. We managed to calm ourselves down and Jasper started the movie. We were at the part where Optimus had been killed when my phone rang. It was Jane.

"Hey" I said.

"Hey Bella, we were wondering if you were going to be coming back anytime soon?" She asked me.

"Of course, plotting on what to do with my room if I don't come back?"

"Yea Alec thought the ultimate guest room but I thought maybe I could use it as a third room for when I get bored with the other two." She laughed.

"Hmm Alec's idea sounds better to me. But, I'll be home shortly so save some dinner for me."

"Hmm better hurry then, I'm really hungry tonight."

"Actually I left my car at the house, Wanna pick me up? I'm at Jaspers." I asked

"Sure, see you in a few."

"See ya soon." I hung up and looked at Jasper. He was asleep.

I quietly disengaged myself from Max who was snuggle up against me and gave him a kiss. Then I gently pushed back the hair from Jaspers face and brushed the back of my hand across his cheek before getting up and quietly leaving the house.

I didn't notice that Jasper had woken up and he was watching me as I left his room.

I walked outside quietly shutting the front door behind me. It was hot outside and I sat on the front steps basking in the sunlight. I loved sunlight; it was so warm and always made me feel so nice and sleepy. I had been sitting there with my face upturned and my eyes closed when I heard the sound of a car approaching. I opened my eyes and saw Jane turning into Jaspers crescent. I got up slowly, walked down the driveway and hopped into her silver Audi.

"Hey Janie." I said as a buckled myself in. Safety is important after all especially when in the car with Jane.

"Hey yourself, Bella." She responded.

I turned around and looked at Jane. We didn't look like each other at all. She had a very aristocratic face with the straight nose and high cheekbones. She was always a golden brown color like she had a permanent tan. Her eyes were wide, childlike and a very pale blue with darker blue rings around the iris. She has fine white blonde hair that's always perfect. It has the slightest wave to it and she didn't have to do anything at all to it. It was like that naturally. All of these features gave her a very Californian or Australian look and to make her even better she was taller than me; about 5'7. She had large boobs and nice sized hips while the rest of her was thin. I was her opposite. I had an aristocratic face as well with the nose and cheekbones but where she was golden brown I was ghostly pale with long straight blue black hair. It wasn't thin but, it wasn't thick either. I usually lightly curled it to make it less boring. I had leopard eyes. You know eyes that were green but also dappled with yellow. They changed with my mood like when I was scared or angry the yellow would be more dominant but when I was happy and relaxed the green would show up more. I had long, thick black eyelashes and the eyes that were cat eyes were also bedroom eyes. Those features made me look less human and more like an animal given human form. It was weird and I found it unsettling to look too closely at my face. My family and people I knew didn't seem to mind they told me to go out and become a model with my strange looks. I wasn't sure if I wanted to do that though. I was also short only about 5'3 and where Jane was thin but curvy I was just thin. I was very thin sure I had boobs but they were only about a 32 C. I had almost no hips and I had decided long ago that I wasn't beautiful. I had a face that was hard to forget but, it wasn't because of beauty it was because it was interesting and different than everyone else's. The correct word to describe me would be striking.

Janie and I didn't talk much on the way. She was thinking about food and I was thinking about sleep. I did ask her what was for dinner though and her face lit up the way it always does when she's talking about food or eating.

"Oh Bella it's your favorite! Steak, garlic mashed potatoes and bruschetta!" she burst out excitedly.

Even I was excited. Aro always made my steak exactly the way I liked it; rare and spicy. I could live on steak if I had too. That was how much I loved to eat it. Alec said that I was really a cat that had been turned human. I could just imagine what my face looked like now. My pupils had probably dilated a little with the yellow swallowing the green and a dreamy expression would have overtaken the exhaustion. I could hardly wait to make it home.

The drive from Jaspers house to mine was only about 10 min so we made it back soon. Our house was a huge multimillion dollar mansion located in Kingswood. It was a cool grey color with black trim. It kind of reminded me of a castle because it had kind of turret looking things on it. I loved it.

As soon as we pulled into the drive way, Janie and I were out of the car and into the house as fast as we could. We raced into the dining and sat down at the table. We didn't have to wait long. I smelled the food before I saw it. Aro came into room carrying a plate that had huge steaks on it. Then he left and returned with a bowl full of garlic mashed potatoes and left again. This time he came back with bruschetta and a pitcher of lemonade. I studied Aro Night when he sat down. He looked so different and yet so similar to his children. He was the same golden brown as them and had the same pale blue eyes but he was very tall. Like 6'7. Also his long wavy hair was jet black and his face had permanent lines of sadness etched into it. He also had an Italian accent where his children had none. His eyes were heavy lidded and an aura of despair always circled him. He was a good father though and he really did try to be the very best for them. I hoped that one day soon he would find someone new who would help him forget all about his beloved and deceased Mary Ann.

"Would one of you please go and get Alec for dinner?" His voice was quiet and sad as always.

"I will." I offered since Janie was looking at the food like she was a starving dog.

I pushed away from the dinner table and ambled along through the huge house with its lovely décor. I walked into Alec's bedroom without knocking and quickly closed his door behind me. I loved Alec's room. It was done in dark grey, silver, and pale blue. His bed was huge with a bunch of pillows. I closed the door behind me because Alec was smoking a bowl. Aro didn't know about some of Alec's hobbies including this one. I sat down on the bed and Alec offered me a hit which I gratefully took. I watched Alec thinking on how much he looked like his twin. They had the same eye color, same skin color and same hair color although his was dyed black at the moment. Alec was about three inches taller than Janie though and his hair was shorter and styled in a scene cut. With bangs over one eye. I started talk as we passed the bowl around.

"It's time for dinner, so don't act too high. Your dad is eating with us tonight."

"Oh, alright. What's for dinner?" he asked. His voice was rough and hoarse. Very masculine.

"Steak, bruschetta and garlic mashed potatoes. What type of weed?"

"Sounds pretty good. And the kind laced with coke." He responded.

"Alrighty. Let's get going then. Aro will be upset if we take too long." I said standing up and moving towards the door.

I followed Alec down the halls and through the rooms to the dining room. I remembered that we once tried to date but, it had been too weird. Since I moved in with the Nights I had become part of the family in every way but, blood. So it makes sense that Alec and I dating would be odd and just slightly awkward. It didn't last long.

I have a nice buzz going on as we arrive at the table the smell of food making my stomach rumble appreciatively. I sat down and piled food onto my plate. I took the first bite of steak and groaned in ecstasy, sooo good. I quickly wolfed down the meal. Jane ate just as much as Alec and I and she's didn't even have the munchies. I wondered for the ninth billionth time where she put it all. She was like a black hole for Christ's sake.

Aro didn't say much at all as we ate dinner he just sat there looking all sad and gloomy. This made me laugh but, I quickly covered it up with a cough. Janie looked at me weirdly and Al stifled a giggle. As soon as I was finished I excused myself from the table and rushed out of the room. I couldn't be in there any longer. Not with Aro being all emo, Janie morphing into her alternate ego the black hole sucking up everything in sight, Al looking so out of it that he looked brain dead and me probably looking like a starving cat. That was enough to send me into hysterics and I tried to make as little noise as possible as I clutched at my sides gasping for breath. Damn the shit I smoked was good. I put my dishes in the dishwasher and went to my room.

My room was huge with the walls done in an antique gold color. The blinds were crimson as was the rug on the floor and some of the pillows on my bed. My bedding was done in cream. The colors blended well together making my room stunning. Not to mention that it was a dream room, there was a mini bar complete with fridge, a huge flat screen television, a macbook air sitting on a glass desk, a big walk in closet and a huge attached bathroom. If I wanted to I could practically live in my room. I was kind of bored at the moment though so I texted the twins to come downstairs as soon as they could. It didn't take long; the two of them arrived in under five minutes.

"What's the problem?" Al drawled.

"Oh no problem I was just wondering if the two of you were up for a little fun?" I ask with a mysterious smile gracing my face.

"What kind of fun are we talking about here, Bella?" Jane asks excitedly.

"Hmm, I was thinking red Buddha's." I announce going to a drawer and pulling out a small baggie.

"Oh, the family fav. I'm in." Alec announces.

"Me too." Janie says.

"Perfect. Let's get started shall we?" I purr and handing out a small pill to everyone and going to the bar to get myself a glass of water.

Jane and Alec follow my lead and we turn the TV. and wait for the action to kick in. It doesn't take long, only about 45 minutes and then we're lounging on my bed in dazed stupor. I glance at Alec and Jane, looking at their eyes, noting how the pupils have dilated until the black swallows almost all of the pale blue. I laugh feeling just so happy, loving and alive. Janie starts petting my hair while Alec rubs the skin of my arm. It feels good.

"Bella, your eyes look so cool when you're twacked." Alec announces suddenly.

"Cool how?" I ask stupidly.

"They turn pure yellow and you look even more like a cat. A cat that has spotted prey and is on the prowl. It's wicked."

"Huh. Sounds cool. I'll investigate it later." I say as I pet Alec's face. His skin is so soft.

We lounge around like that for a few hours and then Al and Janie leave me to go to their own rooms. I try to sleep but, I get paranoid. It feels like someone's in the room with me. I know it's just the drug but I can't help but be afraid. What if Edward didn't actually die and is in my room planning on killing me tonight. I freak out and run to Jane's room but she's already fast asleep and I don't want to wake her up so I flee to Alec's hoping he's still awake. I burst into the room and crawl onto his bed beside him.

"What's wrong with you?" he asks unkindly. His pupils are still very large.

"I'm afraid that Edward is still alive and going to kill me!" I gasp out my eyes filling with tears.

"Awe Bella, he's dead don't worry. It's just the drugs getting to your mind." He says softly wrapping me up in a hug.

"Can I please just sleep here for tonight. You can move me to the couch or something if I turn into the bed hog." I plead.

"Sure Bella, its fine. Just try to calm yourself a bit and relax. Nothings going to hurt you ever again." He soothes.

I nod my head, feeling much better and burrow myself under the covers. Sleep finds me easily here like it always does when I'm not alone.

I pray that the happiness ecstasy induces will keep away the nightmares that plague me.

* * *

_I'm calling from the back of your mind  
From the places you'll never reside  
Where your thoughts collide  
See places and thousands of faces  
All at the same time  
Look, everybody close your eyes  
Travel to the place in the back of your mind  
The place you'll never reside  
Where thoughts combine  
See places and thousands of faces  
All at the same time  
All at the same time  
All at the same time_

_--Fearless (250 and dark stars);; Falling up

* * *

_

**Write me a review please  
**


	4. AN

Hey so yeah I know I'm a terrible updater but I've sort of given up on fanfiction. This story though I have decided to continue on only it won't be twilight fanfiction. The plot is mostly the same just changed a bit and it will be much longer than originally intended. It's up on this site called booksie and my user name there is rosesfade. It's called Falling so if you want to continue reading Light up the sky I guess I'd go there and read Falling. As I said same characters (different names) just not in the twilight universe.

Bella is Aurora , Jasper is Carter, Alice is Kelsey, Jane is Rachel, Alec is Braden ect.

Here's a teaser for what would've been chapter 4 of light up the sky and has become chapter 4 of Falling:

_I slid past Carter and into the car. I heard the back door open so he must've taken defeat in good grace. Kelsey hopped in and started up the car. She revved the engine and then flashed me a sly smile before shooting forward and out of the crescent. No wonder we arrived at Carters from my house faster than normal, she had a need for speed. We arrived at the school in record time. Carter opened the doors for both of us and then offered us each an elbow. Kelsey giggled as she slipped her arm in his. I was trembling just a bit and Carter who notices everything pulled me closer to him._

"_It'll be okay." He whispered._

_I just nodded and let him pull me along. The gym was dark with pulsing lights in every color flashing and whirling Posner's Cooler than me was playing loudly. As soon as I could I ditched Carter and Kelsey and went in search for Nina. I did not want to see the two lovebirds dancing together. I soon found Nina and began dancing with her._

"_You look great" Nina shouted above the music._

"_So do you." I yelled back. It was true, she had put on more makeup than usual and it was working for her. She was also wearing a tight tank top paired with a high waisted black skirt and ankle boots._

_Tyler joined us after a few songs and asked for a dance with me. Since, I knew he wouldn't hurt me I said yes. I was having a lot of fun I realized and I was doing it without Carter. I was a little shocked but pleased, I was happy that I could have fun without him. A Day to Remember came on with their song If it means a lot to you and before I realized what I was doing I had wrapped my arms around Tyler's neck and he had put his around my waist. We swayed gently to the music and I stared into his cerulean eyes. He was very good looking I realized with a jolt and then a pang of sadness as I realized that I only thought of him as a friend and as long as Benji was around that was all I would ever view anyone as._

"_You know you can't give me what I need and even though you mean so much to me I can't wait through everything. Is this real happening? I swear I'll never be happy again and don't you dare say we can just be friends. I'm not some boy that you can sway; we knew it'd happen eventually."_

_I smiled as my favorite part of the song came on and Tyler smiled back._

"_You know you're very pretty Aurora. I'd probably try and get you to go out with me if I didn't know that you're heart was already with someone else." He smirked knowingly._

_My eyes widened in shock as I stared at him._

"_Don't worry most people can't tell but well I'm a little different. He's blind that he can't see it and he's lucky to have you." He whispered warmth and affection glowing in his gaze._

"_Maybe, but he has Kelsey and I don't want to get in the way of that." I responded warmly._

"_You're selling yourself short there Ro but hey all the better for me if he never finds out. I'll have a better chance of sweeping you off your feet that way." He said smugly._

_I rolled my eyes and swayed to run by snow patrol._

"_I'm serious here. Any guy would be so lucky to have you and the one guy who does doesn't even know it." His gaze was indeed serious._

_I pulled him in for a hug and whispered in his ears._

"_Thank you. If things ever change with my feelings for Carter you'll be the first person I call."_

_He smiled brightly at me and kissed my cheek. I continued dancing with him for a few more songs and then left to go fix my make-up. On my way to the bathroom I saw Carter with his arms wrapped around Kelsey, dancing quite provocatively. I suppressed a shudder and pushed the hurt into the back corner of my mind. I sped up and once in the bathroom I ran inside of a stall so that no one could see the hurt and pain painted on my face. I tried desperately to hold back tears. Why couldn't it be me that Carter loved? I put my hands over my eyes and tried to calm myself down. I was almost ready to go back out and face the world when I heard an all too familiar nasally voice. It was Millie DeLarosa and her bitch squad; I decided to stay in the stall until they left. Millie the hateful bitch with the huge boobs. She could be pretty I'd decided long ago if she wasn't always giving out the stink eye. A perpetual frown marred her face and her dark indigo eyes were always narrowed in a glare. She had strawberry blonde hair and a light spattering of freckles. She was a mega whore and her pretty exterior hid a heart made of stone. I tried not to listen to their nasty conversation but when I heard my name I just couldn't help myself._

"…_Aurora she's such a fucking slut." Millie was snarling._

"_I know did you like see her all over Tyler? It was like fucking with clothes on. And her and Carter? No way that those two are just friends. I bet they hook up behind poor Kelsey's back all the time." Her friend Lily Gian replied._

_Lily was Millie's second in command. She was tall and curvy with dirt brown eyes and dirty blonde hair. She was definitely a follower and had no back bone. She was also the dumbest person I've ever met._

_Katrina Di'all decided to put her two cents into the conversation as well. Katrina was short with ebony skin and slanting hazel eyes. She was short and stick thin and while she still hung out with Millie she was almost smart._

"_She thinks she's so hot but really she isn't. People only talk to her because they feel sorry for her. I bet that's why Carter talks to her because really without him then she has no one." Katrina's high soprano added in._

"_I know I mean she walks around like she owns the fucking place. Just because she dated Jesse Osparino the hottest male to ever grace this earth doesn't mean she's hot shit. And then with her whole sob story about how he tried to molest her. Like what a bitch. Everyone knows she killed him because she's psycho." Millie ranted on._

"_You're totally right." Lily simpered._

"_And when Kelsey and Carter break up, Carter is mine. I'll take him away from little Miss Aurora just to spite the bitch. Plus he's damn sexy. I'll turn him against her and everyone else too." Millie hissed._

"_Oh you're quite devious." Katrina praised._

_I had heard enough. I stood up and stomped out of the stall. I was pissed the fuck off and these bitches were going to pay._

Again I'm really sorry about not finishing this story as fanfiction. Here's the link for my booksie account : www. booksie .com/rosesfade (no spaces though)


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